Been a while...

Busy life keeps me from blogging.

lots has been going on, not too much time to explain/describe it all.

what I really want to blog about tonight is how it really seems unimportant to even blog what HAS been happening because I don't feel like all that has happened is even all that important.

sums up a general malaise I think that I've been stuck in: namely, "it's just life"... which implies that I'm not really enjoying it all that much lately.

And there's no reason why I shouldn't be enjoying it... it's not like it's going horribly or something like that. Honestly, there's been lots of GOOD stuff going on
1. Exams over for a couple weeks (hooray)
2. The semester almost over!! (yes!!)
3. Girls' weekend with mom and Jess--I love the traditional girl's "hunting" weekend!
4. a good interview which has led to the "next step"-- I find out more Wednesday
5. a couple dates/potential dates...
6. Thanksgiving in a couple days

And yet, I can't seem to feel EXCITED about any of it, for various reasons I guess:
1. Exams will begin again in a couple weeks
2. I have a TON to do before the semester can really be over
3. the weekend is OVER and I didn't get any WORK done
4. I don't think I'm even interested in the job!!
5. many confusing reasons I don't want to get into
6. I am not feeling like Thanksgiving will be a relaxing weekend at all


BUT, I know I ought to be just as happy as a clown, after all, I'm truly lucky and blah blah blah... which is true.

Meh, I'll quit my... complaining.

I think I might know a source of my malaise and it actually angers me that I would let "it" get to me... I apologize, I've gotten cryptic.

I feel like lately, but today in particular, I've been bouncing back and forth all over the spectrum-- from feeling motivated and happy and alert and relatively energetic to just completely demoralized and discouraged and tired and realtively apathetic.

Sometimes I think I'm nuts! (and some of you probably agree!)

Eh well, life goes on. and it is "just life"

Lil' Leroy...

Lil Leroy Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.

"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."

Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Leroy's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday. Little Leroy, of course, thought he did. Leroy's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behavior over the last year and write a letter to God and tell him why he deserved a bike for his birthday.

Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.

LETTER 1:
Dear God: I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one. Your friend, Leroy

Leroy knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the l etter and started over.

LETTER 2:
Dear God: This is your friend Leroy. I have been a pretty good boy this year, and I would like a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Leroy

Leroy knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the letter and started again.

LETTER 3:
Dear God: I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday. Leroy

Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either, so he wrote another letter.

LETTER 4: Dear God: I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Leroy

Leroy knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a bike. By now, Leroy was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to church. Leroy's mother thought her plan had worked because Leroy looked very sad.

"Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said. Leroy walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary. He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into his house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen. Leroy began to write his letter to God.

LETTER 5:
I GOT YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.
Signed, YOU KNOW WHO