Crisis Averted... temporarily?

So for some who've talked with me in the past few days, you're aware I've been suffering from a mental breakdown regarding "the future" -well folks, you'll be happy to learn that I am pulling out of it.

I talked to a woman who works for Olive Garden (in FLORIDA no less) in market research and I realized that is probably what I want to do. so now, how to get there?

Still a little flipped about the whole, I will graduate soon and have to move somewhere and be alone and not know people and all that jazz, but--I guess I feel more ok about that. Today.

So what else is new? I think I get an exam back today and I am hoping it will not ruin the afternoon. On the upside, no quiz today! :)

sometimes I think about just how much life we (people in general) waste. it's odd though, somehow it doesn't spur me on to NOT waste time, it just makes me feel bad about wasting the time. In some cultures there is no concept of "wasting time" you can't "waste" or "spend" or "lose" or "save" time. Time is just there. It doesn't have the VALUE that it does in our culture. Maybe I should move. But I don't think that would help, by now I've been so inundated with our culture of "time" that there's no help for it I fear. Eh well

So in talking to my roommate last night I realized something, that I let myself get swept up pretty easily in the excitement of a new romance and then when I start to think about the reality of it and it's not all fairy-tale perfect, I immediately revert to the mode of thinking where I compare the NEW to the OLD... more specifically to one particular relationship--and the new guys always lose. Which is only NATURAL, since obviously a new relationshp isn't going to be as stable of comfortable or secure as a long-term thing. And in spite of awareness about how NO guy is perfect (not even said old guy), I think I'm getting too easily turned off to guys. Does that make any sense?

And then that fits in well with the minor mental crisis that I'm just pulling out of right now, to do with the fact that life changes too quickly sometimes and we're all left just trying to keep up.

And that's when I realize that maybe I just shouldn't worry about any of this "deeper meaning" stuff and just be all care-free and not worry about tomorrow just like 80% of today's population.

Motion City Soundtrack is good. I feel like whoever wrote the songs would be interesting to talk to. Plus the lead singer's voice has a really cool, unique sound to it. IMHO.

Some lyrics-o-the-day

How it got so cold that words just froze
We had to wait 'til summer to find out what was said
One of the best times that we had.

I know I say that I'm just fine,
But I hope you wonder from time to time.

I was nervous from the start that our muscles might tear us apart
(Are muscles tearing us apart?)
From the words that carve our lives to the words that take us by surprise
(I was never taken by surprise.)
From the sounds that disappear to the changes we begin to fear



We love that game but we never play
'cause we will lose and we wanna stay
the way we are, the way we've been for far too long

And we feel like rain,
when the words all sound the same.
As the curtain closes on another day



I wanna know what it's like to be awkward and innocent, not belligerent.
I wanna know how it feels to be useful and pertinent
and have common sense.. yeah
Let me in, let me in to the club, cuz I wanna belong,
And I need to get strong, and if memory serves,
I'm addicted to words and they're useless.


so now I've wasted another significant amount of my time, and I think I will go brush my hair or something.